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2019 Welcome

Happy Happy New Year 💫

I like to spend my New Year day in review of the previous year.

What goals, aspirations, desires, hopes, & dreams did I strategize to achieve, & see forth through fruition?

What did I choose to let go to allow space for other things to grow, thrive & evolve?

What amazing things showed up in my life this year, providing me endless opportunities to live a life beyond my wildest dreams & imagination?

Now what magic will I co-create, achieve, and provide through this new!?

I’m not set in stone more sure beyond the knowing I am meeting each moment with an open heart, treating my life & experiences as extraordinary.

I choose to use duality in seeing life in both the eyes of a beginner & simultaneously honoring my wisdom of time.

I choose to embrace, #Joy #implementation as the word/theme of this year. Let’s here from y’all in the comments I’ll tell you mine

I have wanted to learn more about a few personal areas of improvement and always had what I perceived as a valid reason to choose something outside of self… I am choosing me more consistently:)

Ujima: The collective work & responsibility.

Habari Gari?

Day 3 Welcomes you back!

Ujima / Collective Work & Responsibility

“To build and maintain our community together and make our brothers’ and sisters’ problems our problems and solve them together.” Prosperity is no person left behind that your worth of existence IS! Innate and IS without a doubt well. To see each other framed in the light of community, neighbor, friend, extended family, Humanity is our super power the ability to shape the world to your own image and interest.

Ask yourself three basic questions: 🗣

1. How are you building your foundational future personally?

2. How are you contributing to building and maintaining the foundation of your family?

3. How are you contributing to building and maintaining the foundation of your community?

Evolve in our daily growth as individuals & community.

There is something powerful in our consciousness. Even more so in the collective

Thank you for your participation, time and effort & energy.

#TheMeIWasTomorrow is Accepting Podcast interviews for the new year! 👀link in bio .

Thank y’all for the support in listening, liking, sharing & comments!

Social follow back @jamiquans

Do you have a great topic or guest suggestion?

Let’s hear it!

I appreciate the comments or suggestion letting me know your around!

Email: JamiQuan@jamiquan.com

For booking : https://calendly.com/jamiquan

As always thanks for listening to

The Me I Was Tomorrow Podcast 🗣

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Wanna vary your listening choices you can choose from the 10 platforms we rock out on to your delight! Feast

iTunes/ Apple

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Habari Gari? 💛 Welcome back!

Principle 2

Kujichagulim / Self Determination

“To define ourselves, name ourselves, create for ourselves and speak for ourselves.”

Freedom is the ability to shape your world to your own image and interest. 🙏🏾

I spent a lot of my life fulfilling a role/title. Mother, wife, daughter, sister. I was taught and told what it meant to be those things and how those labels existed… but who was and am I? Who are you?

My life goals and desires have evolved, shifted and morphed into and through many more moments, and honestly none more so or less than the next. The IDEA that any moment is my life is significant and how I replay it is all me.

The determination internally that I give cadence to is how I navigate life.

Ask yourself three basic questions:

1. Who am I?

2. Am I really who I say I am?

3. Am I all that I ought to be?

Pondering until I arrived at an answer to these questions was and is the point for me.

Evolve in Kujichagulia daily.

There is something powerful in the evolution of self. .

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#TheMeIWasTomorrow is Accepting Podcast interviews for the new year!

.https://calendly.com/jamiquan

Thank y’all for the support in listening, liking, sharing & comments! Let’s do the Social media exchange I’m @jamiquans

Interested, have a great topic or guest suggestion?

Love it!

Wanna leave a comment or suggestion just cause ok.

Email: JamiQuan@jamiquan.com

As always thanks for listening to The me I was Tomorrow Podcast 🗣

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Looking to vary your listening choices you can choose from the 10 platforms we rock out on to your delight!

Feast

iTunes/ Apple

Anchor

Google Podcasts 

Spotify 

Breaker 

Castbox

Overcast

PocketCasts

RadioPublic

Stitcher

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Umoja: Unity 1st Principle

Happy Kwanza!

Happy Kwanzaa! Habari Gani?

Celebrate good times come on!!!!! Day 1of 7 where each day a core principle is reviewed, a candle is lit in representation,

(3 green, 1 black, 3 red. 1st day Black is lit) and finally thoughts & gifts are exchanged.

1st principle

Umoja: Unity.

To strive for and maintain unity in the family, community, nation, and race. (Humans)

With alllllll that we are facing today as a WORLD I found this an amazing opportunity to step back and say, YES.

Come together right now!!!!!!! (I know you sang it!!!did you do a dance move too? I strum the geeetar 🤣)

How are you or can you begin rite now showing up in unity with yourself, family, community, nation, & the human race?

What’s 1 thing you can do TODAY to UNITE yourself with someone else?

Nothing complicated, acknowledging another human as you walk by. EYE contact and a smile goes a long way. Hold the door. Speak with genuine interest

See ya tomorrow I’m looking forward to an update! And yes!!! I’m checkin for you

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Thank y’all for the support in listening, liking, sharing & comments!

Let’s do the Social media exchange I’m @JamiquanS

Interested in being a guest, a great topic or guest suggestion? Love it!

Want to leave a comment or suggestion

Email: JamiQuan@jamiquan.com

or book

https://calendly.com/jamiquan/podcast-guest

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We are accepting guest spots for the new year!

https://calendly.com/jamiquan/podcast-guest

💛

Thanks for listening to :The Me I Was Tomorrow Podcast

Wanna vary your listening choices?

10 platforms we rock out on to your delight! Feast away 🙂

iTunes/ Apple

Anchor

Google Podcasts

Spotify

Breaker

Castbox

Overcast

PocketCasts

RadioPublic

Stitcher

What has over 200 downloads!

“The me I was tomorrow” Podcast and in honor of some sorta made up marker I’m inventing, I now have a producer 👀😆!!!! A producer and editor for my podcast! Say it IS SO!!! What! I went from a 1 person, to guests to producer & editor…

Oh and a fancy mic to add to the majic makin! It’s not even a holiday and look how the universe is making waves.

I lost 3 guest recordings with over 8 episodes between them.. but hey it’s ok! I like recording guest and with a new mic in the mix plus a producer hummmmm I’m thinking this wait is well worth it.

It’s ok!

My audio was spotty but I didn’t care I knew what I was striving towards. I was using what I had! My phone and head set, but after break my head set needed an upgrade and I went from a desktop to a laptop.

It’s ok!

I have learned to let go of the perfection and initiate knowing that improvements through evolution are the fun parts too!

A fellow podcaster dropped in and offered to share talents! There are many many many ways to enjoy a journey,

And so it is so!

We are back live next week and I’m so excited for y’all to tell me how it sounds now!

Ohh! I’m fancy

As I get ready to skip my way into the new year I’m doing it with intention. Cleaning house, daily rituals reinforced, self and how I interact with all around me.

Welcome back y’all! Let the good times continue! I appreciate the likes, shares, support and listens!

Ps if you haven’t listening go. It’s on the top 10 platforms and the links are in a post. Leave a comment and tell me what you think!

I’m following the yellow brick road 🤣

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Cyber Monday 24 hour Sale 50% off

Thank you in advance. The universe has brought us together.

🎉24 hour SALE SALE SALE

50% off 🎊 https://lnkd.in/g55NaX4

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“It’s entirely possible that the story we tell ourselves all day every day is true and accurate and useful, the very best representation of the world as it actually is.

It’s possible, but vanishingly unlikely.

-10000% truth-

. https://lnkd.in/g55NaX4

The mirrors in our minds should reflect the best of us not the worst of someone else. What will happen when you show up for yourself like you show up for those around you, or how you wish others would show up for you?

Have you decided you can’t solo bootstrap it anymore? Im here to provide you the support to create & install a new narrative that is sustainable in 8 weeks. https://lnkd.in/g55NaX4

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You don’t have to re-write your daily narrative alone. Let’s do it together.

Offering 50% off #BLACKFRIDAY-CyberMonday Sale💛💯

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#storytelling is intricate, layered & magical.

You tried it, a lot. But here’s the truth the new Year is less than 5 weeks away.

How has your current narrative been workin for you?

In addition what is it costing you $$$$ to hold space with the current story you have been telling? #NewYearNewMe

Only 24 hours left!

https://lnkd.in/g55NaX4

Becoming – Michelle Obama

Did yall catch the live on Oprah, or any where else!? She has been promoting this wonderful piece of art and I am so happy to offer it today via Amazon! I was so excited to watch her dialog and share her life and experience for over an hour! I was captivated by the conversation and topics shared. So here is my gift recommendation! For yourself or for someone special in your life? Thank you in advance for choosing me!

Happy Holiday and I appreciate you choosing to shop with me as an affiliate.

Black Friday Thru Cyber Monday Deals Amazon Fire Stick

I Applied to 200 Jobs and All I Got Was This Moderate-Severe Depression

This was so AMAZING that I am sharing! Read it! #TuesdayThoughts #givingTuesday #blackstoic #themeIwastomorrow

Bertha Mason's Attic

“And when everything else is gone, you can be rich in loss.”

– Rebecca Solnit, A Field Guide to Getting Lost

About Me, Your Friendly Neighborhood Millennial:

I was your garden-variety smart kid, shuffled through GATE programs of every type from kindergarten onward. In sixth grade, I left the classroom in the afternoons to study Latin roots with our school’s principal for the spelling bee circuit. As you can probably imagine, I was bullied a lot (Apparently, no one likes a first-grader who says “in addition to” instead of “and.”). I went to a competitive high school near Silicon Valley, where– with my AP courses– I had a 4.0 cumulative GPA, but was not in the top 10% of my class.

After getting summarily rejected from the Ivies, I went to a small university in Oregon, where I worked harder than I thought possible to graduate a year early with…

View original post 2,351 more words

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I was always striving to make her proud… Until I made myself proud first.

He text me, first indication that something was up. July was the first time. A stroke. I was on my way to Arizona for my 40th birthday celebration. Driving on a road trip.

I was frustrated. We are what we are and I am old enough to understand & accept. She has a life and she lived it. Hard it was and through it all at this point she is reaping what she sowed. I take it as a lesson.

I remember thinking how beautiful she was, outside. I was always afraid of her. She did not like me. She could not look at me without seeing him. Her hurt and pain at the lose. I understand the sting of being left behind, you think. I learned it well. I learned how to see lose, pain, lack, not enough, rejection, fear and anger. She boiled with rage and took it out on anyone and everyone. I wasn’t special.

I grew up with stories of windows being busted out with bricks and rocks. Rages of slashed tires, and angry exchanges. One of the stories I grew up hearing the most was potty training. How my mother would beat the sh%$ out of me and my aunties would have to come and save me.

Heres the thing she wasn’t always the one who started it,  but she taught me how to finish it. I didn’t realize how small she was because she felt so big.

She has no middle name. A first really is enough, Im 40 and in all my life I do not remember EVER a time that she greeted me with love. Was happy to see me or even welcoming to me. At best she is tolerant. I use to sit. Waiting for hours for her to show up. She often didn’t show nor call.  In her world she did the best for me, and she is RIGHT. I will never negate that. She gave me to anyone who could care for me when she could not. My father, her sisters, my grandmothers, or her friends. She was ok with leaving and not dragging me around. I am grateful that she did her best. I am not angry. But it is my life. We have a relationship of our own making.

She is like a snake or wild tiger that has been wounded and is old and has been abused. You ever see that movie with Whoopie Goldburg  Kingdom Come? There is a part in the movie when her spouse dies and they are contemplating what to put on his tombstone and his wife Whoopie says “Mean & Surly” he was mean and surly. That was a choice on how he chose to live. My mother is the same. She suffered from depression and who knows what else.

One thing I appreciated about my grandmother was that she told her truth about mental health. She never lied to me about the challenges that had been faced in my family. She told me how she had her first mental break down and being hospitalised. She described how she could not stop crying and screaming and worrying until the ambulance had to be called. She took a pill a day she said to keep the insanity at bay. She took pills to not feel the pain and then she took pills to feel. She told me how her heart hurt from angry words spoken and never able to take them back.

Regrets and mistakes that when left ignored and untreated fester and spread. Through the years she chose to feed the fear, pain and her regrets and I learned how to do the same thing. I learned how to expect hardship and look for troubles. I expected for the shoe to always be falling and for everything to be on the cusp of failing. That was the model of my life. Never enough, always regret sorrow. All valid, all real, all the journey without judgment. That does not negate my responsibility to maintain safety and distance. Always remembering that she is who she is and that is ok. Caution.

As I watched my mother, live through abusive relationships, drug and alcohol abuse, the lose of her career, mounting debt and over the years multiple debilitating health issues mounted until she is now very sick.

Sick internally and externally, a body can only take so much. Last night my brother text me to tell me he would be calling me… that is not a good sign. He called me to tell me that the ambulance had to take her in, again.  She was weak and could not move. I know the symptoms, this is our 3rd time with her. But more for me. I have lost count. I have stoped counting. Its not worth keeping track. I will not keep track anymore. I will no mark and look at all the loses experienced.

I am writing because I have been up sense about 430 am, maybe earlier. And my life is good. Despite it all my life is great. I am exactly where I need to be.

I love her. I make sure she is taken care of. I put in my best effort and at night when I lay down I am accountable and I rest easy knowing I have done my best. I have put down perfection and expectations of living up to something better, later. I tell the truth of my perspective, honoring the now I am in. The now.

Having a relationship with a person is optional. If my mother was NOT my mother Im really really sure we would never speak again, and she knows this. Shit she probably would not speak to me again if I was not her child. The funny thing is neither of us are hurt or angry. We accept that we are opposites. She doesn’t care for me, to see me or understand me. She has expressed to me she is SELFISH and has been her whole life. She talks about it with God and she is who she is. She loves me, she gave birth to me and kept me alive she says. And for that I love her and thank her, she does her very best and lives her life how she sees fit.

Don’t we all want love, less judgment and more understanding, and the ability to do the same? Reciprocity. And when I was able to understand that point I shifted. I separated her from my expectations and my immaturity. I stopped wishing it had been different and accepted HER story. I listened. Learned that she was and is always doing the best she can with what she has. With all that she has experienced I must always keep empathy in my heart. I cause no harm, wish no harm. So our relationship is about harm reduction. I see her every other week physically, because well even at the last stroke she likes to hit and yell. I know she is angry, I have empathy. So we talk shit to each other, she threatens to hit me and I threaten to send her to a home if she don’t act right, because she cant keep running off the help. AND she KNOW she cant live with me. She laugh and say, I know I cant live with you. Im to mean. & I agree.  We laugh.  I braid her hair, after I brushed it and oiled it good. I loved playing in her hair when I was a kid. Ill take it, today, any day. She sit, and eyes close, and she smile. She comment on how its growing and I tell her how pretty she is. In those moments, 2 times a week. We are. I am her seed, she is my roots and my tree. She is strong and able. NOTHING keeps her down. She has tenacity and ALWAYS finds a way. She has taught me to be resourceful. WORK hard, achieve what every I want, I can. Strive and never give up or in. My mother drove a Subaru in the 80’s and she worked in San Francisco in the Financial District. My mother worked for Pacific Bell… Hahahah do you know who that is now! She set the bar high and left a grand impression.

I was always striving to gain her attention and love, something learned and realized I had already. Then I realized I needed to have for myself.. And I did…

Special Announcement- Podcast Alert

https://calendly.com/jamiquan/bridgesdiscovery

Welcome to the New Year New Me BETA Launch Writing Intensive & Personal Coaching Program (Yet to be named in my HP voice)

I am accepting 5 individuals who are willing & ready to work with me for 2 extra weeks before the MAJOR launch in 6 weeks!

Lets Learn to take “ACCOUNT”!

A-Assessment

C-Create Personal/Safe Space

O-Ownership of self

U-Utilize

N-No

T-Trust/Transparency

https://calendly.com/jamiquan/bridgesdiscovery

Community thank you in advance for your support!

I know this day finds you well.

Everyone wants a reward… And I have 2!

  1. BOGO 1/2 Off! Sign up over the next 24 hours & invite a friend. Receive Beta Pricing
  1. When you refer a friend & they sign up, you are rewarded with $100 and they are too!

The Universe said MOVE and here I am, trusting.

Website is undercontruction, so! Yep!

I am reaching out to my community anyway knowing it’s Done!

https://calendly.com/jamiquan/bridgesdiscovery

Writing Intensive for Trauma Healing. We all have a story that we tell in life. The interpersonal story of pain, shame, fear, hurt, anger, loss and uncertainty. It has crippled you and your ready to rewrite the story. The place that we have found ourselves drawn to again and again. This year, lets work togther to move past the hurt by. Letting it go, see you on the other side.

Jami

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